Why I still have NBSB

I'm 25 and never had a boyfriend. Why?

The old me:  "I'm not pretty enough".

 If  I were the old me, I would repeatedly tell myself "It's because you're  not pretty enough, not good enough. There's something really wrong with you!"

It was so dreadful. It wasn't really easy for the younger me because I believed back then that life is all about education and a boyfriend (really). I remember being so desperate. Those who knew me then would agree with  this. I remember asking my PolGov professor one day with this question  (out of nowhere),

"Sir....magkaka boyfriend po ba ko sir?"

 and his response was out of this world (mind you haha),

 "Oo naman, mas maganda ka pa sa kalabasa"!


What does he mean? At least for me, it means,  I'm not as pretty as the other girls. I continued thinking "No one will love me. I must not have any standards na. Basta lalaki okay na!"




In between: "I have to meet Love Himself first "


When I was 18 though and in the midst of all these insecurities,  I met Someone. Someone that made me realize that there's really something wrong with me (sin) , but He took care of it already. Someone who told me that I'm beautiful twice over (because He created me and saved me). Someone who said with His life and blood that I'm precious and worth dying for. (I'm honestly so kilig writing this! HAHA!) I met the BEST MAN ever. My THE ONE - JESUS CHRIST.

 I'm THAT BEAUTIFUL to  HIM? I'm THAT PRECIOUS  to HIM? SOMEONE LOVES ME?  WOW.

I slowly shrugged the thought that I'm not pretty or good enough. (slowly, yes, it took years and years for me to fully embrace who He says I am because there are times that insecurity creeps in. I'm grateful that He keeps on reminding me of His love and my identity in Him.) I learned the process of taking my eyes off myself and what's  beautiful for the world and look to Him.


"This means that anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone; a new life has begun!"  2 Corinthians 5:17

The new me.


 It's surprising that nowadays people were surprised whenever they would discover that I never had a boyfriend nor a suitor (YES!) I hear them say , "Weh? di nga? baka hindi mo na agad pinapansin", " Irereto kita sa pinsan ko teacher!"  or "siguro ang taas taas ng standards mo."

STANDARDS. The old me didn't have this but now, Yes, I do have. I do have high standards - God's standards: Someone who also met Love Himself  in between and loves Him more than  he could ever love anyone (even me).

I'm 25 and never had a boyfriend. Why?

1. God is molding me. He's really doing a big work in my heart. I have to be molded to the woman God wants me to be. A woman who's so whole and complete in Him. A woman whose pursuit is His purposes.


"... people used to tell me the best way to prepare for marriage was to date around and to get into all of these short-term flings. I learned the hard way that that wasn’t true, but what I did realize in that season of my life was that the best way that I could prepare for marriage truly was to learn how to find my fulfillment in Christ, how to make Him my First Love, how to cultivate that spiritual purity in my life where He was my All in all."  - Leslie Ludy

2. He's prepared a man for me. My MOG. Not an other half but an equal match. He is also whole and complete in Him. No need to settle for anything less than what He wants for me - His best. I'm sure He is still doing a big work in his heart too (hehe).


3. It's not yet His time. I know He knows when it is the sweetest. Just like what is written in the book of Ecclesiastes, "He has made everything beautiful in its time". 3:11a


If it's His will, walang makakapigil.
If not, we surrender to His good, pleasing and perfect will. :")

I really dread letting others know that I have NBSB but now,  I'm surprisingly joyful. I think I wouldn't have it any other way.  I'm amazed. As I look back,  it was like my THE ONE protected me all along and ensured  na Sya ang magiging FIRST SUITOR,  LOVE at YES  ko.

 I'm glad that He is.

And for you, princess, whatever status you're in, whatever the condition of your heart right now -hopeless or hopeful, shattering or healing.... it's not too late. One day,  you will also meet THE ONE in between. The One who loved you first. He loved you first. He's fighting for that moment.

Let Him love your first.

"Let Him love you first.

Before you allow the right guy to pursue you, give your yes to the Lord first.

Because God wants to show you how you should be loved.

He wants to give you heaven and earth before anyone can promise you the sun and the moon.

He wants you to experience his genuine intention to serenade you with His goodness and mercy.

He wants to rejoice with you and quiet you with His love.

He longs to have a lot of your “firsts.” - Joena San Diego 

It's such a beautiful beautiful Love story. You and Jesus.


P.S.

 And Only He knows when the heart is ready for the second one. :")

Photo by Blubel on Unsplash

Discovering Pastel

I just can't strop scrolling and staring! Indeed I'm falling in love with Pastel!

Well, I remember during my graduation (more than a year ago), Pastel was  the required dress color. I never mind about it  before. Not knowing I'll meet Pastel again last night! My little sister is Christ showed me the sample dresses for our upcoming Appreciation Night. They we're all so beautiful! I just wish to wear 'em all! (sigh). :)

So today, I surf the net  to look for more of Pastels! Here are some!

I'm so excited to go shopping and stare and  admire Pastel colored stuffs!

See, I even changed my the design of my blog today into a Pastel inspired one (I did tried hard!) Some weeks ago I turned this into a minimalist. I simply loved black, gray and white...but then! I discovered PASTEL. HAHA.

I'm really really really  excited! I think I'll have a Pastel themed Dresses in the future and so does Wedding and House..and.. and.. and!!!! Teehee!


Credits to Pinterest for the lovely pics! YAY!!!!

Touch Up

Tuesday morning Touch up (is there even such a term?) It's amazing on how a little powder, lipstick and blush on can do  wonders. Okay lang ba? At least it's definitely better than the first pic right? Whoa. Scary. Happy Tuesday! :) I hope to learn more on how to take good care of myself. HAHA

True Beauty

       I believe that nothing is an accident, so when I actually encounter this podcast over here or here , I just know that it's for me. This is entitled "True Beauty"  by Nicole Whitacre. I don't know who she is but as I listened to her, it's as if she's the other Mr. Thammie Sy (someone God used to remind be that I am beautiful) in my life . But no, I hesitated, Ms. Nicole taught me other thing. She finally made it clear to me that my God is the beautiful One.

       Here's actually my notes while listening to her message. I honestly cried. There are a lot or revelations here.
     

      To see beauty is to see God. 

To know beauty is to know God. 

God's beauty is: 

Eternal

Lovely

Powerful

Wise

Holy

“It was when I was happiest that I longed most...The sweetest thing in all my life has been the longing...to find the place where all the beauty came from.” 

― C.S. Lewis, Till We Have Faces

Beauty comes from my beautiful God. 

If you're complaining about how you look, you're actually arguing not with the mirror but with God.

 You have a controversy with God. 

It's as if you're telling Him "I could do the creation thing a whole lot  better". 

Trust in His wisdom and goodness. 

I am born in God's thoughts. 

That is the Grandest thing. 

I will resolve to receive my body with gratefulness.

Because of the the most stunning act - Jesus dying on the cross. 

I saw beauty once again. 

He reawaken our vision of real beauty.

If you're looking for your beauty, always look in Christ, not in the mirror or camera.

We are to reflect the glory of God.

The reason why we still feel that we are not beautiful enough is because we took the glory away from Him to ourselves.

God is beautiful and He created me in His image 

becomes I am beautiful because God created me. 

The problem now is it starts and ends with us instead of God. 

It's the preoccupation of myself.

I'm  so self absorb.

I think too highly of myself.

I am  aspiring something more.

We thought of the compliments that we will receive later.

We want that few moments of greatness!

We never get what we think we deserve.

We all desire attention and approval for how we look .

We want them to think or to say "Oh, doesn't she look pretty?" 

We are never satisfied.

We want attention and approval but the truth is 

Jesus deserves all the adoration and admiration.

Glory is the Lord's and it is His alone. 

Don't steal His glory.

The problem with vanity  is we took the story and  write us as the lead. We put us in the lead. 

Sin made us glory robbers. We want center stage. We are grasping for glory.

If your heart was genuinely transformed by the Gospel, you will genuinely want God to have all  the glory.

Understanding the true nature of my struggle can hep me overcome it and repent more quickly.

Cure: Gaze to the beauty of the Lord!!!!

The Gospel made me think less frequently about myself.

Imagine that you are in the Revelation 4, in the throne room of God, you will not think about your hair or clothes anymore but just be in awe of the One who is truly Beautiful.

Application: 

look for an aspect of God' s beauty!

where do I see the beauty of God here (as you read the Bible, as you look at his creations)

behold to the beauty of God again

praise Him

As we do that we won't be thinking about ourselves. We will forget about ourselves.

We will focus on our precious God.

It's be for minutes at first and then it'll hours and days of gazing at this beauty. 

Struggle with beauty starts when we put self not God in the center.

He is like the Sun, as long as he is in the center, everything  will stay in their proper places. 

Gospel offers freedom from vanity and self-focus.

            Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.

                                                             (Proverbs 31:30)

Praise God's beauty and get praised. :) 

People will sing your praises as well. 

Not to us, LORD, not to us but to your name be the glory, because of your love and faithfulness.
(Psalm 115:1)