One Saturday Morning and Words of affirmation

One Saturday morning.

Last hours with the sunflowers.

Lovely moments with a dear friend. 

My heart is just so full  with words that I'm hearing from other people these days. Words that I never thought I would hear and I'm just overwhelmed.  Let me document them with the pictures that we took in UP one Saturday morning. 

                                          "Teacher, ang ganda mo ngumiti". - Czyrish, 9 

                                 "Ycah, thank you sa blog mo about sunflowers!!"  - Ate Jen

                                      "Ang fashionista mo talaga , Teacher!" - Erika
                                  Parang ang bagay sa 'yo ng mga sinusuot mo." - Gelyn

                                  "Teacher, ang blooming mo. Sino yan aside kay God?" - Yvette

                           That's one of the hardest questions to answer. Wala namang ibang sagot eh.

More than what other people could say, I'm eternally grateful for our God who just lavish me with the greatest affirmation: His life, for my life. HUHUHUHU. 

So, you also want to take Education Units in UP?

You suddenly want to be a Teacher but you have a different undergrad course? Maybe taking Teaching/ Educ units is for you! To take LET (Licensure Exam for Teachers) , 18 teaching/ educ units is required. 

Some of my friends and church-mates asked how to take Educ units in UP thus, I decided to post what I know about it. 

Here's the info that I got from the UP College of Education Website:

NON-DEGREE CERTIFICATION IN PROFESSIONAL EDUCATION (CPE)

Requirements:

1) a Bachelor’s degree

2) General Weighted Average (GWA) of at least 2.25

3) Official Transcript of Records (original and one [1] photocopy)

4) NSO-issued Birth Certificate

5) NSO-issued Marriage Contract (original and one[1] photocopy) for married female applicants

6) Three (3) copies of 2×2 colored pictures (any background color)

7) PhP 700.00 application fee (for Filipino applicants) or US$ 30 (for foreign applicants) to be paid at the University Cashier, UP Diliman through Trust Fund No. 9786-600-499-450

8) Medical Certificate issued by the University Health Service (upon admission to CPE)

All documents must be submitted in a long folder.



FOR INQUIRIES, please contact:
The College Secretary
Tel. Nos. (632) 9207815, 9818500 local 2807/2817
Email: updeduc.osec@yahoo.com

Source: http://educ.upd.edu.ph/certificate-in-professional-education/    (as of June 22, 2017) 

When you go to the office of college secretary, they'll give you a leaflet about CPE as well. 

After submitting the requirements, I had an essay exam and waited for two months to know the result. They will send an e-mail or a text message. :") For other questions,please do contact the office of the College Secretary.

 I hope this helped you somehow for your #roadtoUP. :") 

For my own #roadtoUP you can read my post here: Little Girl's Dream: UP 

I'll be forever grateful to Teacher Camille for helping me in this journey. Hi Cams! You're a blessing! 

Why do I love sunflowers?

They're not that beautiful.

Honestly, it wasn't natural for me to love sunflowers. I didn't find it appealing at first. Most especially their big brown/black center part called seed head (I hope I'm right).  Some years ago, I think  roses and tulips are way better. But then, though the sunflowers are not that beautiful, there's something about them that's so charming and I fell for them over time. I can't resist the facts that  they stand tall and confident no matter how they look. They remind me of being  secured of who you are and that you don't need to compare yourself to the other beautiful flowers/people around you. You have your own kind of beauty.  Yes, they're not that beautiful, but they are secured and that makes them beautiful.

They're yellow.

Some sunflowers could have a touch of red or orange but they're mostly yellow right?  And I love yellow. The color is so optimistic. You just always want to look at the brighter side of things. There would always be hope.

They even grow in a challenging season.

In the University of the Philippines, it's been a  tradition to have sunflowers every graduation season. It gives hope to the graduating students and it's as iconic as the UP's Sablay.  The tradition was threatened though because of the calendar shift in the university. The graduation season now falls in a rainy season. But then, we're grateful that the sunflowers managed to stay and we're still enjoying them!

Despite some challenges, the sunflowers teach us to just continue blooming and growing. We were not promised a storm-free life but a storm-proof life in Christ.

They're a source of nourishment for others.

Last Saturday was the fourth time that I saw the sunflowers in UP and I noticed the bees that stay in the disk/ seed head. According to an article, "Sunflowers grow with everything they have only to give away what they spent so much time growing. They are selfless." Embrace that it is always better to give than to receive.  Let's live to love and to be a blessing to the people around us.


They look towards the sun.

This is actually my favorite reason why I love sunflowers. They encourages me as they look to the sun. As for me, I will look to the Son. I will just look to Jesus and by His grace turn my back on the dark. I will live, love, bloom, grow and stand looking  to Jesus.  It reminds me of the verse Hebrews 12:2 which says ".. fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God."


They have a lot of seeds.

When I think of seeds, the Word of God came to mind. In one of Jesus' parable which is The parable of the sower, He said "This is the meaning of the parable: The seed is God's word." Luke 8:11

Over the years, they are a lot of seeds that has been planted in my heart through my quiet time or through my leaders. My prayer is that for the seeds in me to just grow. And as I plant the seeds/ Word to the people around me, the desire is still the same .. for it to grow, stand, shine and continue to multiply. I'm grateful though that growth is God's work.

"It's not important who does the planting, or who does the watering. What's important is that God makes the seed grow. " 1 Corinthians 3:7

"When the sunflower is done blooming, the seeds fall to the ground to wait til next spring, when they'll be new sunflowers."

PS. It was really awesome to stare and enjoy the sunflowers with friends/sisters last Saturday. It was really wonderful  to pray with them while walking along the flowers!!  Hi Gabby and Arl! 

First Semester at UP

Hi! Good morning! I just got my grade from one of my subjects this sem (EDTEG - Foundations of teaching in the Early Grades) some minutes ago and I'm just so elated. Yes, my grades are finally complete. Look:

So it dawned on me. My first semester in the dream university is over.

My heart still breaks that I can't say that it was a very smooth, easy- going , so "sisiw" and purely God- honoring  5 months. Can I just confess? During those months, it was like I was slapped in the face with the fact that I'm so weak, so limited and  not good enough. I even became that group mate that people would usually hate. That group mate who can't contribute much, can't say much. I felt  desperate, useless, brainless and I honestly hated myself. I was too worried about my testimony (well, who wouldn't?). I felt so ashamed. At times, I think I deserve to be stoned to death. And countless times crying out to Daddy God to have mercy on me because I am such a sinner. Why is this happening? It shouldn't be, right?. I felt messy, so imperfect (surprise,surprise!)...emotions all over the place.

Through these moments though, I was in awe again of how God reminded me that He is not over with me yet. He is still molding me toward becoming the woman that He wants me to be. He told me that I have hope, that I still have hope  and that is Him alone. Right now, I can only stand and hope again because of Jesus. Pwede pa akong magbago. Sa totoo lang, hindi ko alam kung saan ako pupulutin or how I could go on in life without Him. Grabe noh? Paano nagawa ni Lord mahalin ang isang kagaya ko? Na yakapin ang isang napakaruming kagaya ko? Grabeng pagmamahal and I believe that is the great love that will continue to change me for the better. I know He doesn't want me to be like this forever so I am offering myself mercy.All I could do is ask for forgiveness and slowly, bitterly forgive myself."...falling is painful. But it also teaches" - Rica Peralejo

I learned and experience a lot from the erstwhile sem not just from that failure ) Hehe. Let me share the lighter and brighter ones!

• I learned that  Values Education is not an easy subject and shouldn't be taken for granted. It is very important for the teachers to be really equipped in teaching this.Decision -making and critical thinking skills are vital for the students. 
• "Hindi lang laro ang laro" just like how Johnson's ad puts it.  In playing, children can learn a lot. That's one of the things  that I learned when I took EDTEG.  It was such a wonderful subject that I just grew my love and appreciation  for children. I also thought for a while of becoming a pre-school teacher! And then I also became  a fond of pre-school / kindergarten teachers. I think they're awesome.  I would smile every time I would see children playing Lego and blocks! I would think that they're developing their fine motor skills. While when they are running around, I would think that they are developing their gross motor skills. It's not enough pala that a child can recite 1-10. It must be checked if they can really count / if they have what they call "number sense". When you ask a child to give you five apples, will he be able to give it? When I see a two year-old using a smartphone or tablet, I will feel sad knowing that her body is still developing and it might affect her posture in the future! It breaks my heart too when parents doesn't care if their children are watching a show with SPG rating or if they just let them watch in YouTube without any supervision! I think children will have a greater effect on me now. 
• It's possible for a Kindergarten class to be so behaved! I love UPIS (University of the Philippines Integrated School) ! Galing! 
• My classmates taught me about https://docs.google.com/document/u/0/ !!It's really helpful when we did our research paper and when I did my case study! You don't have to worry if  what you're doing is saved or not!  I love it. I think it's such a blessing! Speaking of case study, the deadline for that was last May 25 at 11:59 PM (obviously).  I passed mine at 11:57! I failed to proof read and I really regret it. Thus,  I also learned that no matter what, proof read!!! 
• I - CC ang mga ka groupmates!!!
• APA format for references!!
• The real Oble is in the library! Not the one displayed in the university avenue! 
• I can walk from shopping center to Eduk. 
• I can walk from Eduk to OUR. 
• Blue book is a must. 
• Palma hall is AS!!!
• Hotdog (should be Tender Juicy)on stick and dynamite are the best. I'm so grateful that kilala na ako ni Ateng binibilhan ko. hehe.
• The library could be a home. 
• Wi-fi. :) 
• Laptop is helpful (praying for one. Mag Amen ka. :))
• "Ganito tayo sa UP, we do research and we publish it!" - Prof. Muega
• "Dapat lagi kayong research mode". - Prof. Alcazar  

Above all the learnings is the fact that my God is my Father. He provides and He makes miracles like from the time that  I don't have any slot nor professors at first,  then when  I can't attend our observation day,  our presentation time (walang nag ask ng questions, haha!), reporting  up to Grades Viewing. I know it's only because of Him. 

 Kahit hindi talaga sya perfect na sem and it's nothing much as an offering, Lord.   I still want to offer it to You. Thank You so much Dad!!!Hindi mo ako binigyan ng deserve ko! No shadow of hope have I in anything I've done. It's all by Your mercy and grace. In Jesus' Name. Amen. 

Let's do better next sem! :)

PS. I'm eternally grateful to my prayer partners who prayed for me in this season! Hi to my Lola Lydia, VFs, Cherry blossoms girls / Ka - Vg sa office, Ate Jovie, Heart , Jhesie and most especially, Pauleen my loves! Tuesday nights are so wonderful because of your faith and prayers for me! I love you all girls!

When

When my imperfection met His perfection

When my flaws met His flawlessness

When my doubts met Him who perfects faith 

When my insecurities met Him who says who I am 

When my weakness met His strength 

When my brokenness met His wholeness

When my unfaithfulness met His faithfulness

When my past met His plans and future for me 

Updates+ YouTube + UP +Discipleship+Summer

Yay! Yay! Yay!
 Ycah here (of course)!

After watching tons (?) of  videos of Janina Vela and Nate Punzalan (yes, I'm a self-confessed part of #Velafam and #punmily) on Youtube (check 'em out!), I just feel like blogging again (since I can't Vlog. But I really want to! Wala eh, no editing skills nor better camera yet. Yes, yet? hoho. So dito muna tayo).

What?Ang SABOG din eh noh?

I was just inspired by these siblings to just express myself kahit na sabog pa in my sight. Nate said, just release it and you''ll just get better at it. It uplifted me not just in writing blog posts  but also in writing my... wait.. what?

Case study? School observation report? Educ Journal Report? Critic paper? Reports? huhuhuhu! #studentfeels

Yes, this is my UP update. Can I just be honest?  I'm overthinking about  these things  and ending up being unproductive. They are always in my thoughts.. being  unfinished or not yet started simply because of having no idea how to begin. I'm having this struggle of "staring at the blank paper" kinda thing. Or honestly,  procrastination kind of thing? which is really really scary. It prolongs the agony!!! Please rid me of myself. *inhale *exhale #saveme

Been loving school life though.

 The campaign period started and it's nice listening to young people's advocacies. How brave! Ended up praying for them while listening..oh young people. Soon, you guys will also fight for the Greatest human right (wait what is it? Basically, people hearing the Gospel). I declare.

I enjoy learning Child Development! Yas.  Soon matatandaan ko din ang mga theory na yan. Huhuhu. Nice 'cause I have 5 year-old and one-year old cousins plus I teach kids once a month in church. What I'm learning  is really  helpful. How? Well, I love children better!! I don't know, but  ever since I took this subject my heart just beats and beats and beats for children  and their great future. And  it's nice to understand them and their development better. Oh, #nextgeneration

Minor kilig involves seeing Zorro ( he talked to me and pat my back!No, not that I have a crush on him though), walking from EDUK to OUR (pwede naman pala), makisabay sa car ng classmate going to Katipunan, madaan ang AS (Palma Hall) everytime pupunta sa school and my consent letter where I can read "Jessica May Padayao, a student of UP College of Education". #teehee #nuks

Next is discipleship updates! Just went to the "ENGAGE" conference last March 24 over at MOA  Arena. I was with Ate Cams Duhino (yes! Ate Japanese food (sukiyaki) with her. She's so generous..and I'm... I'm  so shy!!!)  and then we also met Kevin (such a blessing! He bought our merchandise!!Yas! New shirt!) Yay! We made it! We finished all the activities before the start of the conference!!

As always, I'm in awe. 12,000 Victory group leaders and interns in Metro Manila worshiping and having fun together??! WHUT?!!! Personally, I met and prayed for an intern from Victory Pioneer!

And .. shhh.. I got kilig too!

1. The thought of.. "Is my MOG here?" (Wow, if yes, we're in the same plaaacee?!!! And that's kilig right? MOG stands for Man of God btw)

2. I saw a guy! He's so familiar!!  Why? He was one of the Candy Cuties in Candy Mag in my time. Now you can see him in a Metrobank commercial  I think. Wow. Don't know his name though  #starstruck lang hehe.

My take home:

-Don't live a life of "do what I say but don't do what I do". (Practice what you preach, Ycs!)

-Do not lose your "SALTiness"!!

-Pastor Steve's new book - The Multiplication Challenge! (That's not a Math book, hehe)

Anyway, speaking of discipleship, I was over the moon when I started doing One 2 One with Wilma (my co-teacher). But then, we didn't finish yet 'cause she's leaving for Thailand soon and I'm .. I'm...:"( .
Still believing that God will grow the seeds in her good heart. :)

Alright, done with the UP and discipleship updates now let's have... SUMMER UPDATE!!!!

I'm thrilled and overwhelmed.  We'll have Junior Kids Bonding in a resort soon and also...

Beach. White Sand. Snorkeling. Star Gazing. Rock formations. Corals. Moana captions for my photos. Boat riding and above all, praying and hearing a Word together. That'll be next month for me. My heart is beating wonderfully against my rib cage you guys.

I still don't know if I'm going to register to PUP Alumni Summer Bonding and Singles' Camp 2017. I would definitely love too! As in!!! But the thought of spending my savings brings tears. Is it wise? What's the fine line between.. shortage mentality and "you cannot spend what you do not have|?" (ANO DAW)  Still learning.. learning.. learning...

That's it! Thanks for reading! For your next adventure, May you enjoy the Creator more than the creation my dear friend!

 Bye!

PS. I finished this post. Matatapos ko din ang papers for acads right? *puppy eyes

So what did I choose? School or Work?

"Lord, no matter what I'm going to choose, You are my Savior. My ONLY Savior."

It dawned on me that I have to choose between my two values - school and work.

For years, work has been one of THE priorities. I'm a young professional and this is my season. I was taught of excellence, prayed for excellence and by His grace ,excelled.  Never wanted to be a burden to my co-workers and as much as possible, I would choose to submit to the authority that God placed in the workplace.

But then, school came. I'm not just a teacher now but a student as well. This is huge for me. I've got to do my best too. As a student,  I've always been a GC (grade-conscious) one. Yes, self-professed GC. Excellence. Excellence. EXCELLENCE! For me, learning is VERY important!


March 1st. Two events. One choice.

The battle begins.

It's a training day in the office. This is a critical working day. I can't file a leave. I still tried and was busted. If I'll be absent, the whole section will be afffected. I was asked not to be selfish and inconsiderate. I will lose the trust of my supervisor and management. Worst, I could ruin my testimony in the office.

It's at the same time observation day for school. We will go to three different schools, observe and submit  three papers out of that. I will have great time learning how teachers in the early grades teach and how the students response. It's going to be my first time if ever and I'm so thrilled. I can also imagine having  a great time with my professor and classmates.

I asked  if the observation day could still be moved but then, it's final.

The decision -making process is about to start. So, what did I  do?

Prayed for direction. (That's the first in  decison making. You want
to have His wisdom over these things.)

Read the Bible. I was lead to John 16. and these verses strucked me:

" Very truly I tell you, you will weep and mourn while the world rejoices. You will grieve, but your grief will turn to joy. A woman giving birth to a child has pain because her time has come; but when her baby is born she forgets the anguish because of her joy that a child is born into the world.  So with you: Now is your time of grief, but I will see you again and you will rejoice, and no one will take away your joy.   - John 16: 20-22


I perceived it as I have to give way to the new baby and as I do that, it'll be really painful. So my  initial words to the Lord was,  "Lord, do You want me to choose school? Please convince me. Please continue to lead me."

I also wrote my priorites at the moment and I ended up writing:

 1. God
 2. Family
 3. School
 4. Work
 5. Ministry

With that.. mukhang school na talaga ang pipiliin ko. Deep inside, I know I want school, pero yung feeling, parang bibitayin or tatalon ako sa bangin in the  coming days.

But still, I can't bring myself  to be confident with my own ability to follow Him, I thought there's a possiblity that I was just being biased dahil nga school talaga ang desire ko.  I asked advice from friends, students, family members and they all have valid arguments...

"Company is more important".

"Dream is better than now."

"The company is the one who gives you  money to go to school."

"It's for your future. "

"Your work is your bread and butter."

"Teacher, you will REALLY learn a lot in school observation!!!!"

"You will be severely punished".

Inhale. Exhale. I continued praying for His lead.

Then, in one of the preachings, I was reminded of having a functional savior.

Functional savior is something or someone  that gives you security, satisfaction, significance, success, meaning aside from Jesus Christ.

I questioned myself, Is my work my functional savior that's why I'm so afraid of ruining it? Is my grade my functional savior that's why I  just can't  let this observation go?

Will I lose my security, satisfaction, significance, success,or  meaning when I lose them?

No. I  still have Jesus.

"Lord, no matter what I'm going to choose, You are my Savior. My ONLY Savior."

Heard another preaching in a Sunday service and I was reminded of "considering others more important than yourself" . With that, mukhang work noh? I don't want to move out of selfishness!

Pero when I talked to my best friend, she voted for School though. Waaaaaahhh! Kalma. Kalma. He will lead me. I continued to declare.

Can you imagine ang pagiging unstable ng mind and heart ko at that time? Shocks. That's why He reminds me this Word time and time again:

 "I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world." John 16:33

Decision-making never been this hard! But at the end of the day, when you ready yourself to surrender  yourself to His will, sasaluhin ka Nya talaga.

Kept on praying and crying out.

Monday came and I received an e-mail from my professor!

If can't make it on March 1st, I can just observe on March 3rd... pero one school lang.

It's like a ray of sunshine for me. I thought wow, I could actually experience observing kahit isang school lang. Thus, I prayed again as I apply for leave on March 3rd. If ma aapprove, it's His will na March 3rd, if not, at will Nya na mag observe ako ng March 1st on the  three schools, hindi ma approve ang leave ko!

Guess what? My leave was miraculously approved (It was hard to have a leave kapag walang Perfect Attendance Incentive in my company)! You know what that means right?

I have..

to..

let..

go..

of the March 1st...observation.

Goodbye..CDC..goodbye PAUW..goodbye great time with classmates.. goodbye..

" Am really ready for this, Dad?"


March 1st. I chose to be in the Traning Day. I have peace but I'm still wondering about the observation and the things that I just let go, hehe.

8 AM thoughts: Oh, nasa CDC (Child Development Center) na sila..

9:30 AM:  Ayan nasa PAUW (Philippine Association of University Women - UP Child Study center) na siguro.

12:30 PM: UPIS (University of the Philippines Integrated School) na sila nyan.

Is this the labor pain? Ang sakit talaga nya eh. Pero in the midst of pain,  in the midst of what I'm going through, I'm in awe that He still used me. Did One 2 One with my dear friend and co-worker. Yes! Chapter 2 na kami! #Lordship

Eto na ba ang ending? Syempre hindi pa. Hang in there my friend!

I chatted my classmates and they were all saying how fun the school observation was. One even sent pictures and videos of what they observed (Hi Caren!Thank you!) . I was told also na.. ako lang.. ang wala...ako lang.. ako lang..

"Dad, did I just really let that go?" "Did that just really happened?"

Naiiyak pa din ako while writing about it.

I was honestly so sad and I know fear creep in and my mind was.. I don't know. Yes, I move, walk,  talk , sometimes laugh.  I know Sya lang talaga yung strength ko  at that time, barely holding on to Him... I think He knows I was kinda crushed.

Kaya naman, as I attended the Thursday youth service the next day... taraaaannn! Ay grabe!! I love those times! Yung feeling mo yung buong service ay para sayo? Praise and worship pa lang kung makatulo na ang luha mo ay parang  gripo na? hahaha.

Alam nyo ba yung topic sa LEGIT week 2? It's Jesus' question :


"Why are you so afraid?"


And it hit me. WHY AM I SO AFRAID? DO I STILL HAVE NO FAITH?

If you have fear right now my dear friend, allow me to write yung mga tumatak sa akin nung gabing yun:

"I am the LORD, the God of all the peoples of the world. Is anything too hard for me?" Jeremiah 32:27

Storms in life are expected to come.

Hindi nagugulat si Jesus sa problema mo. It will not overwhelm Him.

In everything and anything, HE IS IN CONTROL.

When we don't understand the power of Jesus over the storm, we will end up fearing the storm.

Jesus can calm not just the storms around us, but also the storm inside us.

Fear cannot co-exist with FAITH.

When I am afraid, I will put my trust in You. (Psalm 56:3)

- hagulgol na ko dito ayyyy

You can go through that storm because Jesus is with you in that storm.

"Lord, no matter what, You are with me. "


For more messages that I heard, you can visit here: http://www.victoryubelt.org/podcasts/

I call myself  "Princess in awe" because of the privilege of witnessing His might and power, His expertise in impossibilities and all .. like when I went to Korea or nung nakapasa ako sa UP and many more.

Pero hindi ko akalain na  I'll be a "Princess in awe" as well in the midst of the storm , in the midst of whys, pains, tears, doubts.. SOBRANG  in awe of His comfort, of Him being so mindful, of His encouragements and cheers. Amazing God talaga.

After the youth service, feeling ko, ang liit liit na lang talaga ng problema. As in!  Yung future ko, yung buhay ko, sa Kanya nakasalalay. Jesus is for me and not against me. Knowing His power,  I prayed..

"Dad, I know for me it's impossible, pero for You, possible, can I observe three schools tomorrow? *puppy and mugtong eyes"

Checked my e-mail when I went home and taraaaan!!!

Pumayag na din daw ang PAUW na mag observe ako! PAUW-UP and UPIS na ako! Pero no letting go of CDC pa rin, so kinabukasan..

I went to CDC kahit na wala pag confirmation and asked kung pwede mag observe... everything just went smoothly!  Yes, pumayag sila!

Yes, tatlong school yung na observe ko on that day. Yes, it was fun and yes, I learned.

Letting go of the observation was unthinkable for me. He knows that. He knows me too well.

But then He actually helped me in letting go of the thing na alam Nyang hindi ko kayang i let go to lead me and to save me from pag talon sa bangin, I mean from reprimand sa office.  Hahaha.

He is indeed our ONLY Savior.

If you're praying for direction my dear, I declare that HE will lead you to His will NO MATTER WHAT.

Galing ni Lord noh?

May this encourage you. :)

A spring of water flowed from UP!

He turned the rock into a pool of water; yes, a spring of water flowed from solid rock. - Psalm 114:8 NLT 

This post is about my  enrollment feels in UP, the recent upgrade of my faith,  and above all, His glory and power in the midst of it.


Enrollment feels

Yes, I was qualified for admission for the Certificate of Professional Education program of the Univeristy of the Philippines - Diliman (College of Education). Yes, I'm done with the orientation and  by God's grace, passed the medical exams too. Yes, I found OUR (Office of the University Registrar) , passed my  honorable dismissal from PUP and  got a temporary CRS (Computerized Registration System)  account.  Not just that.   I was also miraculously  granted a Service Incentive Leave for the day of my enrollment (January 12, 2017)!

January 12 (or so I thought). It thought it's the start for our enrollment  (Non-degree students) but it was suddenly changed into January 11!! Waaah!At, guess what? January 11 ko ito nalaman!

And SO WHAT  if it was changed? Well, have you heard? UNAHAN SA PROF/ SUBJECT SA UP!!!! I think 30 slots for undergrad subjects and around 16 slots for graduate subjects!!! I even read some blogs and news reports about students camping in school just to be the first in line for the coveted slots! Whoaaa!

So ganon pala sa UP. Will I still have slots if I'll go in the  afternoon of  January 11 or morning ng 12?

Here's what happened:

I went there in the afternoon of January 11th. I realized pwede naman pala makita sa CRS yung mga subject, sched, prof, available slots etc. pero nun ko lang nalaman. I borrowed my co-CPE student's phone and saw "0/30" or "0/16" on the subjects that I want to take. It means 0 .. zero.. wala nang slot!  Not only na wala nang slot but, hindi din pasok sa sched ko yung iba. waaaaahhh!!!!

 For pre-advising, my adviser was in a hurry since I'm the last one for the day. I was struggling with the pronunciation of the Prof's surname etc..  kinda worried because the subjects na pwede sa sched ko are the ones na wala sa plan kong i -take and at the same time, wala na din slot!

I was saddened as I remember  how panicked I was and worried. Which I know is not honoring kay God (I repent, Dad :"() . My thoughts were clouded with what ifs.. "what if hindi ako makapag enroll, what if hindi ako tanggapin ng mga prof.. what if parang maging katulad  lang din to ng missions na hindi natuloy, what if hindi ko kaya yung mga subjects? Wala ako background nun!!!"

That was the rock. THE SOLID ROCK.

I left affter the pre-advising. I decided to talk to the professors the next day. Inhale. Exhale.


Upgraded faith.

I talked to Dad at Mcdo and I'm in awe again of how He is such a comforter and encourager.


Hosea 1:7b

"..I will free them from their enemies - not with weapons and armies or horses and charioteers, but by My power as the LORD their God"

not through me, but by His power!

"Trust Me. I am your helper. I am your shield."

Hosea 2: 15a

"I will return her vineyards to her and transform the valley of trouble in to a gateway of hope."


Wow. He will transform the valley of trouble in to a gateway of hope!!!

And then, that night was the third prayer meeting in our church (Victory Ubelt). I met ate Ayen and Ate Marianne. I hastily asked them to stand with me in prayer for my current situation. It's really amazing how the church can encourage you. Ate Marianne said "Kaya yan, yung dagat nga nahati Nya eh!". Whoa. And I was reminded.

We prayed,  worshiped God, magnified His power, His sovereignty. I realized I fail to do that earlier. I saw the situation bigger than My God and that is a "No, no!"

Before we go home, Ate Marianne, prayed for me. It was so comforting and my faith was really built. I remember her saying the words, "delight in Him and He will give you the desires of you heart". "His ways are higher than our ways and His thoughts are higher than our thoughts."


His glory and power

I went to UP at around 8 AM the next day and waited for the professors. While I'm waiting, I tried my best to just trust in Him and His words. I was really holding my breath.  I then read these verses:

Ruth 3: 1a


And now, my daughter, don't be afraid. I will do for you all you ask.

Psalm 138:8a

The LORD will work out his plans for my life--for your faithful love, O LORD, endures forever.

Isaiah 26:3

You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in you.


What an encouragement again!

The professor came. I talked to her and she was really hesitating at first to accept me. She sounds so nice and compassionate. Indeed an answered prayer already. She accepted me even though 0/16 na. She made the maximum number of students into 17 so may isa pang slot for me! I want to cry in front of her! Salamat po sa pink slip!

Not just that! She's also the one who talked to the other prof if may slot pa for me.  She said "Yes!" she can also change the maximum number of student. From 17 to 18!!!


Oh how our God moved!

"See my daughter, see how I've made it happen."

What-a-privilege to witness how mindful and powerful He is!

YESSSSS! I can move on na! Few more steps pa and I got my Form 5 (registraton card)!! Went to the cashier to pay for my tuition and ID!

Went to Univ shopping center to buy a Lanyard and UP shirt and then ate at Rodics. So clueless, sisig yung inorder ko, Tapsilog pala yung best seller dun! Awww next time na lang.

Went back to Eduk and confirmed if enrolled na ba talaga ako pagkabayad ng tuition.

Me: Enrolled na po ba ako (showing my Form 5)?

The office of the college secretary staff : Oo, enrolled ka na.

Whoa. This is it Dad! Student na talaga akong muli! Seryoso? UP student na talaga ang little girl na nangarap!!  I know You'll continue to save me, Dad! Have Your way in me in this new season. Kamsahamnida Appa!

He turned the rock into a pool of water; yes, a spring of water flowed from solid rock. - Psalm 114:8 NLT

Yes, a spring of water flowed from UP!

Little girl's dream: UP

When I was a child, I had a dream. It's one of those that I can still vividly remember even after I woke up.  It was very simple:  I dreamt of a building with high and wide stairs.


When I was a child, I heard of UP. Well, who won't right? The number one, the best, where the really smart students go..oh the high and mighty.. UP. Yes, it'll be great to study there one day (I thought for seconds), but then I know it's so impossible, there's NO WAY I can study there. I'm not even sure if I can study in high school. Mag UP pa kaya after that? Nah. No. way. Okay. Shrug. Bye.  UP is like that, a dream. A dream that's just too far.

When I was a university student in PUP (yes, by God's grace I made it to high school and then nakapag PUP pa!) , I was in awe already! I'm so grateful and happy to be there. I just love my university. There, we had a professor (who studied in UP) and he asked us to go to UP for a tour and to watch a stage play. It was my first in UP. I was so amazed how wide it is, the trees, the Oble, the students, the Ikot jeepneys...but  what struck me the most is.... the Palma Hall.

When I saw it and climb it's steps, it seems like I've been here before! I've seen this! And yes, it's like my dream as a child:

"I dreamt of a building with high and wide stairs. "

It's so amazing. How could I have a dream about this place?

Anyway, I just find it amusing and eventually I moved on. Maybe UP and I just really meant to meet like that. As a visitor, as someone from another university. Oh, okay.Okay. Shrug. Bye.

I came back again as a visitor after that. Back then, I almost join an activist group and we had a meeting in UP one time. I also watched the lantern festival, shot some school project, ran with friends and  watch Eigasai (Japanese Film Festival). My  future with UP includes still watching Eigasai, run with friends  and  I was also planning to take pictures with the sunflowers there! That's it. No more. no less.

But then I started to become curious about teaching, education etc. How is it really to be trained as someone who'll  teach others? Most of my co-workers majored in Education and they really inspired me. The major thing is the thought that  I could really have an avenue to engage the students, the next generation plus, I could also be an effective first teacher of my future children (Haha, indeed, so futuristic). My heart beats fast when I thought about learning about it, eventually taking the LET and becoming a licensed teacher.

Wow. To think that I hated this thing before entering college.

"Ang tagal ko na nga sa school, sa school pa din ako magtatrabaho?" This is what was on my head at the time the my grandmother told me that she wants me to be a teacher. Who would've thought of a changed mind and heart right? As Ms. Acel puts it: isang  pambihirang pagkakataon.

The initial plan was  enrolling in NTC (National Teacher College) because I thought UP only offers online classes for those who want to have a Certificate of Professional Education. I'm not that into the idea of studying online so..

But then, last August 18, I went to UP to watch Eigasai with Ana. On the way there, I was with Camille, a co-worker who's currently taking up her masters in UP. While we were talking, she mentioned that CPE is not only online but there's a classroom setting too. She knows for sure because she has classmates who are taking CPE!

My heart fluttered against my ribcage. I can't hide my excitement. I was so kilig. So in awe. Honestly, just the thought of sitting and learning in a UP classroom makes me feel so giddy and hindi talaga makapaniwala! Huhuhu!

I called the UP College of Education to inquire  and the secretary told me that if I can submit all the requirements within the week, I can still make it to the next semester (which January  2017)!

I still don't have my NSO copy of birth certificate at that time so I hastily prayed and asked Daddy God  if I can have it right away so that I can pass the requirements ASAP.

Great thing is that God answered that prayer when Shim told me that she got hers for less than 30 minutes in the PSA main office!

I got mine in 20 minutes! Whoa. And now, my requirements are complete! I'll be in UP later to submit them and then we'll see. If it's His will, walang makakapigil. In Jesus' Name Amen! :)

----

November 10, 2016

Hello there! It's been over two months since I wrote this. Over two months since I saw my name in a receipt with "University of the Philippines" written on it. Over two months since I tried to ride the whole route of an IKOT jeep (yes, umikot sa UP, hehe). Over two months since I wrote a very challenging, childish, full of heart na hindi talaga  scholarly  na  essay.

Two months of waiting for their e-mail but there's none.
I'm starting to lose heart. Thinking maybe it's not for me.
Oh those two months. But then earlier, I decided tocall UP to ask and to know the status of my application.

Tantanannnnnn

Me: Hello po. This is UP college of education po di ba?
Her: Yes, Yes.
M: mag i inquire lang po sana  for the result ng exam...
Her: ah wala pang  result yung sa Masters
M: ah, sa CPE po..
H: ah, sa CPE? wait lang...

another person on the phone:

Him: Hello po.
M: mag i inquire lang po sana  for the result nung sa CPE?
H: Wait lang po... ano pong pangalan nila?
M: Jessica May Padayao.. Padayao po..
H: letter P po?
M: Opo
H: Pasado po
M: Pa..pasado po?
H: Opo ......


And the rest is poker face. Ganun pala yun. Yung gusto mo sumigaw at magtatalon pero dapat composed ka pa din.

Huhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhu. Yung essay ko... alam ko si Lord lang talaga ito. Pramis!  I'm just too in awe ngayun. Hala sya oh... UP oh... huhuhuhuhu!!!!

Come on! Let's be the teacher that He wants us to be! I declare favored sched, result ng medical , provision and above all, wisdom! May the purpose why He allowed me to be there prevail!

*tulala

Background Music:

"The Maker"

 by Chris August 

I see You in the sunrise

I see You in the rain

I see You in the laughter

I feel You through the pain

Everything that You have made is beautiful

Oh, my God, I can't believe my eyes

But in all of this to think that You would think of me

Makes my heart come alive

Your love is like a mighty fire deep inside my bones

I feel like I could climb a thousand mountains all at once

And I never have to wonder if somebody cares for me

I love the Maker

And the Maker loves me

I see You, You are creation

I see the grandness of Your majesty

The universe is singing all Your glory

I can't believe You live inside of me

More than just some words upon a page

You've shown me in a million ways

But there is one that stands above them all

Hands of creation on a cross