I choose to Love

You're my beloved..you're my bride..

Listening to Kari Jobe's My Beloved while sitting here after another day at the field.

The song is somehow is my comfort song, not the song itself, but the knowledge of Who is singing this to me. :)

Disclaimer. I'm not gonna write about the song or something...

 but about the "another day at the field" part.

Got it? Okay. Breathe. :)

Imagine my joy when once again I got the chance of witnessing and learning media stuffs outside the station itself. And yes, indeed, I didn't fail to witness and learn.

We interviewed an owner of a coffee shop this morning and their black forest was pretty much amazing and  I learned about silence. 

Prayed.

Ate PANCIT! PUTO! BBQ! LUMPIANG SHANGHAI! (they have to be capitalized since it's like a Fiesta).

We then move on to a freelancer and my heart is just beating for event organizing. OR Maybe for my "forever at 21" Birthday Celebration :)

Answered prayer. We got a lessor at the House of Representatives! and It just marked my first time at the congress 9 I learned to be a model in front of Batasan, bet yah! A professional cameraman holds the cam yow. So blessed!)  I learned about mission within the Philippines. Since I'm just accustomed with a mission within campus and other nation, not really.... at mountains of the Phil.

Going back at the station after a long day of work and food, I thought that would be all. I thought..something's already different, I thought something's just so right.

Friendships. Meaningful Relationships. Acceptance.

As I viewed images, memories and feelings...What's within surprisingly came out. 

They also thought of the things others are thinking about. 

I thought again, I will not be affected, I will not be affected...I will not be affected...

But here I am writing about it.

Yes I'm affected. Maybe before, I cried, got so down and all. But at this moment, when pain starts to come in...

I just  looked at the sky..."Jesus...who am I without You?  without Your security? without Your forgiveness? without Your unconditional love? I think these people won't love me anymore as You love me..." 

Then He asked me.."does it matter if they love you back? if they treat you better? what really matters to you?" 

I thought in a while what really do matters to me..."it's You!" I answered...

"yes, it's Me...and how do I love you? How do I love them?"

I whispered, "unconditionally...."

...

He chose to love even at those times that He's drowning at incomparable physical and emotional  pain.  

In the midst of rejection, He chose to give His all. 

He chose to love...He chose to love...

I'll always be His beloved and I, Ycah, just like the One who chose to love me, choose to love.